In this Lesson

A favored author of mine, Julia Cameron, has said, “The best way to know yourself is to write.”

These exercises will help you explore the question, “Why am I the way I am?” by diving into your past experiences, beliefs, and personal growth through different writing techniques.

Take your time. There’s no need to rush through these. Written reflection is powerful and requires a mindful approach if we are to use it to gain understanding.

  • Exercise: Make a mind map of some of your strongest beliefs about yourself, others, and the world. Then, trace them back to their origins.

    Steps:

    • Write down your core beliefs (e.g., “I must work hard to succeed,” “I am not good at public speaking”).

    • Identify where these beliefs came from (family, school, past experiences, culture, religion).

    • Ask: Do I still believe this, or is it something I’ve outgrown?

    Reflection: Which beliefs still serve you, and which ones are holding you back?

  • Exercise: Identify three emotions that frequently arise in your life (e.g., joy, anxiety, anger, peace). For each emotion, answer:

    • When do I feel this most strongly?

    • What past experiences may have shaped this emotional pattern?

    • How does this emotion influence my behavior and decisions?

    Reflection: What patterns do you notice? Are there emotions you want to understand or manage differently?

  • Exercise: Divide a page into two columns.

    • Left Side: Write how you think others perceive you (friends, family, coworkers).

    • Right Side: Write how you truly see yourself.

    Reflection:

    • Where do the two perspectives align?

    • Where do they differ?

    • How much of your identity is shaped by external perceptions versus internal truth?

  • Exercise: Write two letters—one to your younger self and one to your future self.

    Letter to Younger Self:

    • What do you wish you had known?

    • What advice or encouragement would you give?

    • How have your past struggles helped shape who you are today?

    Letter to Future Self:

    • What do you hope will remain the same about you?

    • What do you hope will change or evolve?

    • What lessons do you want to carry forward?

    Reflection: How does looking at yourself from different time perspectives shape your understanding of why you are the way you are?

  • Exercise: Write a short summary of your life in five chapters, each representing a key phase or turning point.

    Guiding Prompts:

    • Chapter 1: Early influences (family, culture, childhood experiences).

    • Chapter 2: A moment that changed the way you see the world.

    • Chapter 3: A challenge that shaped your character.

    • Chapter 4: A success or realization that helped define you.

    • Chapter 5: Who you are today and what you’re still discovering.

    Reflection: What themes, patterns, or key influences emerge?

this is the “why”…